Brettuns Village Trunks & Leather

Old Trunks, New Leather.  All from Maine.

March 31, 2010

Where did March go?  Here it is, the 31st, and that means tomorrow is
April already. I think there's still some New Year's Eve confetti
stuck in what's left of my hair, but all of a sudden the entire first
quarter of 2010 is boxed up and ready for filing.  Wow.  Years grow
shorter, not longer, as you said, Mr. Buffet.  At any rate, here comes
April, and in Maine that means one thing and one thing only:  You've
only got one day left.

When you've only got one day left there are a lot of things you may
want to try to fit in. For example, if I walk down the hall to the
Sales Department and ask them what they'd recommend when someone in
Maine only has one day left, that bunch of drool poolers would flat
out tell you to jump on the Brettuns Village Deal of the Week
(perforated side leathers, a buck a foot with free shipping).  In the
world of high pressure web sales that'd be the best they could come up
with.  It's OK, that's their job.

Out in the warehouse, where our employees are running around trying to
make sure that if you place your order today it gets shipped today,
and where you don't want to stand in one place for too long or you'll
get blind-sided and knocked clean across the aisle and into the
decorative doo-dad racks, and those racks came out of an old shoe
factory so they aren't all that sturdy and there's a better than even
chance that at least one shelf will crack and then all manner of
little leather craft decorations will rain down on you, and believe me
when I tell you that a lot of those things have prongs on the back;
prongs that are just sharp enough to make you say 'GOLLY!' when they
land on your noggin.  Anyway, that sentence got away from me but the
point is the warehouse crew would tell you to spend this one day
you've got left doing absolutely nothing but sitting down.  Don't
move.  Maybe enjoy one cigar, but that's about it.

The front office staff, with their coffee machine that takes those
cool little 'coffee shot' cartridges so they can make just one single
cup of Raspberry Vanilla High Fiber Decaf  at 3:12 pm to help round
out their work day - and this quite a crew let me tell you - they'd
tell you to spend that last day figuring out how to use our Sole Bends
(which were tanned to be used as floor tiles) to make cereal bowls (I
kid you not) and they'd also remind you to go take another look at the
Deal of the Week and just buy some of each of the items listed there
even if you don't have any idea what you'd ever do with it (that's
apparently they way they shop up there, based on all the LL Bean boxes
we see flying in the door).

Here in the Shipping Room, where Charlie and I spend our time, if you
were to hop in your pick-up truck, point it up I-95, take the Lewiston
exit, swing past the metal recycling yard, take a right at the
National Guard Armory, under the overpass, and into the dooryard here
at Worldwide HQ, come on inside and we'll tell you exactly how to
spend the one day you've got left.

This is Maine, after all, and when it gets to be March 31st just about
anyone with a pair of wool britches can tell you that the only thing
you need to even think about doing is to fill out the annual Moose
Hunt Permit Application so that you can get it delivered to the Inland
Fisheries and Wildlife building in Augusta before the cut-off time.
Now, keep in mind that this deadline is only for those who still fill
out the paper application.  These are the same people who have to put
on snowshoes, walk out of the woods for 3 hours to get to the road,
get the truck running, drive an hour and a half to get down to an
organized township, find the post office, and lick that one stamp, and
they'd have to do that today in order to make tomorrow's deadline.
For you online applicators, you've got until May 14.

The State holds their annual Moose Permit drawing in late June, and
it's a big, party-like affair attended by hunters, moose lovers,
families, guides, old timers, and kids.  This year will be my 21st
year to throw my name in, but I've yet to be drawn.  Maybe this is the
year.  I'm not complaining - Amanda (my wife of 21 years) got drawn
back in 1992 and she was kind enough to invite me along.  We put our
little Becca, 10 months old at the time, in the backpack, put a bullet
in the old 1951 Browning Safari .30-06, and took us a walk in the
woods up near Moscow, Maine.  A week later we stopped by the butcher
shop to pick up our little white packages, all 420 pounds of it.  If
you haven't tried moose before suffice to say it's lean as can be,
more tender than beef, and very mild tasting, with none of that 'wild
game' flavor.  It's good.  Even after we ate that moose for two and
half years it was still good.

So, consider this fair warning - time to pay the fee and fill out the
paperwork.  Best of luck to you - I hope you get drawn this year.  Oh
yes, one other thing before I sign off - up above where I was talking
about front office staff and warehouse staff and sales agents I think
we all know just about exactly how many people that boils down to and
what, within a letter or two, is his first name.  Just you wait though
- the payroll is growing and one of these days, as I have often
threatened, we're going to get us a forklift.

Over and out-
Churchill Barton
Brettuns Village Leather
Lewiston, Maine

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